Do you Shake the Poop?

Did you know your supposed to shake the poop into the toilet, when using disposables?
I'm sure you didn't and I'm sure you never noticed the label on the diaper package. I never did. I have also noticed that in the past few years, the labels are starting to vanish. The one in this pic is of the store brand diapers. Huggies, Pampers, and Luvs no longer have this label on their packages. I searched their sites and only the Pampers website states that under 'Helpful Hints'. It's down at the bottom.
Some people might just shrug and say "So what, it's just a little poop." But lets think about this on a bigger scale here. The average NB has between 3-6 poops a day until they are on solids, between 4-6 months. So, that's roughly 675 poopy diapers. Then, once they are on solids, it's about 1-2 a day. So that's about 1095 poopy diapers.  That is a whopping 1770 poopy diapers that have been sent to the landfill in your childs diapering life. Now multiply that by EVERY baby out there right now. uh huh. Pretty gross.
Now think about this.
When it rains, water seeps into the landfills where these diapers have been sent and despite our best efforts, some does leach into our watershed. Pretty unnerved now? You should be. Poop is gross, but it belongs with all the other gross matter that gets flushed and sent to water treatment plants.  So, why not just flush it and send it where it belongs? Oh right, that requires extra work and you getting more up close and personal with the poop.
As parents, we get puked on, pooped on, and peed on by our kids, sometimes daily. Why are we so unnerved by number 2? This should be part of our standard procedure by now. 'Wipe poop off bum, dump poop in toilet, chuck/wash diaper."
We need to stop being chicken about this and just do it. I say,  SHAME on any diaper brand that doesn't label their diapers with this simple statement. Stop letting parents be lazy about this, poop belongs in one place and it isn't the garbage.

Breastfeeding stories

I'm having one of those days where I just feel like I'm under attack about breastfeeding and how I've done it. 

So, I have decided to tell the two very different stories of my two children, when it came to breastfeeding. One is still in the works, but is still very much so valid. 

My Son:  Our bonding relationship in general was off to a rough start due to how his birth was. I didn't get to hold him until he was cleaned up and wrapped like a baby burrito. I remember holding him and staring into his jelly looking eyes (due to the antibiotic eye ointment) and him staring back at me. I failed to nurse him during the crucial time after his birth. Later, the pressure was then on to get him to eat. I had nurse after nurse come in telling me that he had to nurse. I had lactation consultants coming in and fussing with my boobs and my baby. They drizzled formula on me to try and get him to latch on. By the time I left, he was nursing, but he was still sleepy and not really interested. 

At home, it took almost a week before my milk came it. The sweet sound of my baby gulping filled my ears. Then the misery started. He had a tucked in chin, making him resemble a baby bird, but also making it difficult for him to nurse. I suffered from cracked nipples that took weeks to heal. My left one is scarred from how badly it was cracked. With cracked nipples I suffered plugged ducts that turned into mastitis, leaving me useless and in bed with my baby shaking with cold chills. I struggled through nights of screaming as my son had emptied me and cried with hunger. I gave in a few times, giving him a bottle with the formula that 'magically' appeared at my doorstep. This would fill him up and he would sleep, then I would sleep. 

Pumping so the I could go back to work was challenging. I had a manual pump and I do not recommend them. I could barely get any out and we had to supplement with formula while I was at work. He took the breastflow bottle with his milk warm. It never seemed to bother him that it wasn't me. 

At 6 months, my son decided he didn't want bottles of any kind anymore. He ate only baby food and woke up when I got home from work. I would take him to bed with me and he nursed while I slept. 

He continued to nurse until he was 2. I nursed him through teething and a double ear infection that Christmas and then he never showed interest in it or asked for it again after. 

My Daughter: With my daughters birth, I was able to nurse her immediately after she was born. She suckled, not really interested in it for anything else but comfort. All she wanted to do was nurse. Her rooting reflex was beyond strong, with her going after anything that smelled like me or milk.  She has continued so far, making her demands quiet clear by head diving for it when I hold her. 

I am also working again, but this time with a dual electric pump. She doesn't like her milk warm and she doesn't like the breastflow bottle. It's almost as though she is saying "I know it's not mommy, don't even try to trick me." She hasn't ever been supplemented with formula and it hasn't 'magically' appeared at my doorstep. Coupons have, but not actual product. 

I am hoping that we will be able to continue as long as with my son. So far it is the lifesaver of teething. 

A postpartum problem

There were many things I read and was told about postpartum. Mostly it had to do with blood, clots, and having your privates feel like they were just run over by a tank.  I actually made the mistake after having my son, of inching up on my tippy toes so I could see how bad the damage was in the hospital mirror. (bending over wasn't an option yet)

My mother shared a story from my birth about how she was taking a shower, after she had me, and a clot the size of a quarter appeared in the shower stall. She screamed, a nurse came in to see what was wrong, then she literally picked it up and took it away. To this day my mother is not sure what was more traumatizing; the fact that it came out of her or that the nurse just picked it up like it was a quarter. 

Blood doesn't bother me. I'm one of those weird women who is actually happy to get my period now. In HS not so much, but then I also needed a bottle of Midol to make it though that week. No, now after having kids, I'm happy about it. I take it as a sign that my body is functioning like normal. It's kind of like having a light flash on saying "Everything is OK down here". And since I can't see all of "down there" I'll take anything that is a signal of normality. 

After my daughter though, things were not normal. The initial bleeding and swelling went away after about 2weeks. But it was followed by pain. I didn't really pay it any mind, because after all, I did just stretch everything to it's limit. So I didn't worry much. Until the romance started coming back into our lives. Then it was a problem. 

I don't know how to describe it other than a widespread, abdominal, sometimes sharp, mostly dull pain. When I went in to get it checked out, I cried when the midwife used the speculum and winced when she prodded my lower belly. This hurt more than birth. She said it looked fine and to just rest some more. I went after a month to see an OB (a male) and he was pretty much well non-sympathetic to it. Almost to the point that it was like I was making it up as an excuse not to be intimate with my husband.

 I'm sorry, but I don't need a new excuse, having two kids that sometimes don't sleep, is enough. Thank you. He prescribed a estrogen cream and gave me a sample to try. I tried it. Then I read in the side effects that it's not supposed to be used while breastfeeding. So I chucked it. No Hormones for me. 

Another month passed and I decided to go and see the female OB that I went to during my first pregnancy. She was great as an OB for yearly, etc, but I wasn't big on her when it came time to birth. Which is part of the reason why I had switched. 

I made an appointment and felt waves of nostalgia as I walked up to the building (which they have (sadly) now torn down to expand the hospital side.)  She listened as I explained my problem and how I had seen another OB and how I was prescribed estrogen cream and my hesitation to use it. She took a peek and then we talked some more. One of the reasons I liked her so much is because she dumbed down the medical lingo for us non-medical folks. (I don't like having to google everything) She told me that the skin had atrophied, which simply means it is thinner and more sensitive than it used to me. She talked about how this is something that happens to women when they hit menopause and that that is why I was given the cream. 

I'm not in menopause, I just had a baby. 

She then started asking me questions about my life, if I was sleeping, working, taking my vitamins, etc. Then she specifically asked if I was taking enough iron. 

No. I had stopped taking it simply because I had run out and just didn't think I needed it anymore. 

She then said something that every OB needs to say to their pregnancy, postpartum, and nursing moms. 

"You need to take your iron. You need to rest. Don't worry about the baby weight until a year. Give yourself time to heal and don't try being a super mom."

I couldn't believe that I had even thought that I didn't need it anymore. That was the one thing she and my midwives had pounded into my brain while I was pregnant. Take your IRON. Eat your proteins. The fact that your not pregnant anymore doesn't mean you can stop. 

Simple Lessons learned the hard way. Sine I've been taking my iron, my problem has vanished for now. We'll see what happens after the next one and what my life is like when I hit the big M. 

Party at the Crib

For the past two months, my darling daughter has been waking up at night. Sometimes this is once a week, the past two weeks, it has been three times too many.  The time that she wakes up varies as much as when she wakes up. Usually though, it's when I'm done for the day and getting ready for bed. I usually let her squawk for a few minutes. She does wake up in the night, let out a few cries, then goes to sleep. So I just wait to see if she's grunting out a fart or if she is really awake. 

If I realize she is really awake, I hurry, brush my teeth, wash face, and get in there before it turns into screaming hysterics. I pick her, sit in the rocking chair, and nurse her. There have been a few rare nights where she goes to back to sleep and I get to go to bed. Most times, she nurses and then proceeds to either play or scream. Mostly it has been the latter. Now mind you, my daughter is now 9months old. I was pretty sure this stuff only happened in the first few months. I endured this with my son and my husband found me many times in tears in the nursery, rocking him while he just screamed.  

I have also ended up in tears many times with my daughter. 

It wouldn't be so bad if she was just screaming and crying relentlessly. She has started grabbing anywhere that skin is showing and pulling at it until she loses her grip, scratching in the process. I keep her nails short, but even short nails hurt horribly. 

This whole endurance test has lasted up to 3hours. There have been two mornings (that I remember) where I was still awake when my husband woke up to get ready for work. 

The worst part is that she doesn't sleep in after being awake for 3hours in the middle of the night. Knowing you are going to be getting only 3-4 hours is a horrible reality sometimes. 

This past time, I just gave up, turned the light on and let her play on the floor of her bedroom. I sat in the rocking chair and dozed lightly while she threw her blocks across the floor. After half an hour of this, she crawled over rubbing her eyes.  I shut the light off, nursed her and she promptly went back to sleep. 

Half an Hour. 30mins. 

Not 3hours of intense mental breakdown and hearing loss. 

I felt so stupid. Why didn't I do this sooner?? Why was I torturing myself this way, by making her do something she just didn't want to do, but that I wanted her to do so desperately? 

This was a simple lesson to me as a parent. That despite everything that we may try to make our children do, they are their own person and have their own ideas and will. All we can do sometimes as parents, is just step aside and be there when they need us. 

At least now I know how to get more sleep at night and how to end it peacefully without tears. 

Sugar Dance

Sugar. The bane of almost every parents existence, at least of those that care about their kids.
Sugar is a topic of constant debate in my home. Should I put sugar in the cookies or should I use the Agave/honey? If it is up to my husband, sugar wins out. My son eats them with or without sugar. The only difference is that when he has had sugar, he does a Tasmanian Devil dance through the house. Pillows, blankets, sofa cushions, and toys are rendered asunder and left in his wake. He crashes into the walls, chairs, dining room table, and even crashes on the hardwood floor in a way that would normally send him into tears. But the Sugar pumping in his veins sends him in a flurry again.
The bigger problem is that I am as much of an addict as my son. Only I don't go into a destructive fury, I do laundry or clean. I know I am a sugar addict, I wake up some mornings with a hangover that would make grown men cry and avid espresso drinkers shake. Gratefully this is not everyday.  My husband doesn't seem phased by sugar. He may get spurts of energy from hot chocolate, but mostly he falls asleep after a bowl of ice cream. If I have one,  I'm up until midnight, feeling like the squirrels you see trying to cross the street. Jittery, scared, and borderline insane.
I hate sugar. I have plenty of sugar free, applesauce, honey, blue agave recipes. Some of them I created myself, others I've found. But I can't seem to be rid of the stuff. It is always sneaking back into my house in the form of chocolate chips, brown sugar, or just pure granulated.  I do my best to limit it since I can't seem to get rid of it. My children are fine without it. It's me that is shoving chocolate chips into my mouth while doing laundry in the basement. It helps me through the insanity of having kids. Some women turn to wine, I have my chocolate chips. I guess wine is more refined sounding, but I would be drunk by the time bedtime came around and "If you give a mouse a cookie" doesn't sound good slurred. Though some Dr. Seuss might.

Autism and the Amish: part 1

**Disclaimer: I am not a Doctor. I do not have all the facts. I am not trying to cure anything.**

I have done some reading on this, since my curiosity was piqued while watching "Down on the Farm" part of  The Business of Being Born 2.  In the movie Ina May Gaskin made the claim that the Amish do not have Autism and that they have not had a single case of it on The Farm. Some sources I have read state that there is Autism in the Amish communities, but not to the extent of which it is in the rest of the modern world.  It has reached frightening statistics in the US.
We are talking about 1 in 110 are diagnosed nationally with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). 1 in 90 of these are boys.  It is no wonder parents are clambering for any kind of answer. Yet, my question is now. Does it have to do as much with vaccines and environment as it does what happens during pregnancy and birth? In this part, the Amish seem to have the answer since they have few to no cases of it in their communities.

Here are the basics of the Old Order Amish. They don't have electricity, they go by horse and buggy, do not attend public school, do not educate past 8th grade, do not vaccinate,  do not let pictures be taken of them, and they do not talk to us "English". There are some sects of Amish who are more open to modern things, who go as far as to send cards, ride in cars, see modern Doctors, and have farm stands to sell there goods. My mother has bought Amish Doughnuts and other produce from their stands.

So adhering to the standard, the women birth in their homes/beds with no medication, no fetal monitoring. Nothing.
To some this is medieval, to others what happens in hospitals is cruel torture. But if these statics are true, then that speaks louder than words.

To quote out of the first link.

"So far, from sources inside and outside the Amish community, I have identified three Amish residents of Lancaster County who apparently have full-syndrome autism, all of them children.
A local woman told me there is one classroom with about 30 "special-needs" Amish children. In that classroom, there is one autistic Amish child. Another autistic Amish child does not go to school.
The third is that woman's pre-school-age daughter."  The Age of Autism: The Amish anomaly
By Dan Olmsted

3 in a community of hundreds? Thousands? And this is just one community, what is this statistic if we combine all of the communities? This makes autism become that rare odd disease, that genetic blip, rather than something that is becoming prevalent and scaring the living crap out of parents.

 I'm going to say here that I know the Amish do have their own set of issues. Due to the closed nature of their groups, there has been inbreeding and it has brought several genetic issues to the front, explained below.

 "Genetic diseases: Some Amish groups have a very limited gene pool. For example, the vast majority of Amish in Lancaster County, PA, are descendents of about 200 Swiss citizens who emigrated in the mid 1700s. Because they traditionally do not marry outsiders and because few outsiders have joined the order, the "community has been essentially a closed genetic population for more than 12 generations." Thus, intermarriage has brought to the fore certain genetic mutations that were present in the initial genetic pool (as they are in any population), making the Amish host to several inherited disorders." ₅ These include dwarfism, mental retardation and a large group of metabolic disorders. One in 200 have glutaric aciduria type I; they are born healthy, but can experience permanent neurological damage when a mild illness strikes. From 1988 to 2002, the Clinic for Special Children in Lancaster County, PA, has "encountered 39 heritable disorders among the Amish and 23 among the Mennonites.....For 18 of the disorders seen regularly at the clinic, the incidences are high, approximately 1/250 to 1/500 births" ₆ 

I'm not going to run off and become Amish, but apparently there is something to be said for the purity of their birth practices. They could use some fresh genes in their pool, but genetics aside. We are talking about a mysterious disease that is ransacking our children and stealing them away from us. Parents sob daily in Doctor's offices around the country, as their hearts break to hear the word 'Autism' come from the Doctors mouth. Others sink hundred of thousands on care, treatment, hopes, and heartbreak.
This is a modern reality. Yet, if in these communities there is but a blip of Autism. Than that speaks volumes.
 And it goes back to what I said in some of my posts from last year. During our pregnancies, we are told what to eat, what to avoid, what is safe and when we go into labor: it's all out the window. There is no dose monitoring as to what is safe for the infant, as it is also being pumped with whatever is being given to the mother. We are talking medicines that have not been tested to see how they affect infants. Some don't even have a set safe dose, it goes by the Doctor. And then, to have them be exposed to it for hours while the mother is laboring. Is one day of discomfort and pain too much to give for a healthy baby, especially after nine months of carrying a child that is soon to be the center of your world as soon as you two make eye contact.  

Be Aware and be Wary.

Sources:
The Age of Autism: The Amish anomaly
Myth "The Amish don't have Autism"
Autism in Amish
The Amish
What is Autism | Autism speaks

 I am going to keep delving into this mystery, hence why this is titles 'part 1'

The Co-sleeper and the Crib-sleeper

The biggest difference between my children is where they sleep. This isn't how I wanted it to be, I had envisioned either a huge family bed or them in their own beds.
 I started them both out the same way. For the first few weeks, they both slept on my chest. Then, when they learned how to nurse laying down, they both nodded off with my breast as a chin pillow. I have many many fond, shadowy memories of them that way. Then, slowly I moved them into the mini co-sleeper I have attached to my bed. My son never lasted long in it, so it always ended up being a place to store my water bottle, books, and other things.  My daughter slept soundly in the co-sleeper, sometimes through the night. Nap time, I nursed them both to sleep on our bed, then silently, slinking away I left them there with pillows on either side. At 6 months, I started putting them to sleep in the crib in the nursery. With my son, he would wake up around 11pm , I would get him and nurse then slip into milk-drunk slumber. My daughter would wake, nurse and then proceed to scream for an hour with me on the last nerve by the time she fell back to sleep.
My son has since been in the habit of sneaking out of his bed at night and into ours, oddly in the same routine we had when he was in his crib. When I was pregnant, I tried to break him of this habit. Mostly because he was a restless sleeper and I was worried he would slap, kick, and roll onto the new baby. This worked to no avail. It ended up with several nights of him actually waking completely and then hiding under the dining room table.
I am not a fan of 1am hide and seek.
So, I gave up in favor of sleep.
I had the baby, and things went according to above. Only with her, he was in the bed between my husband and I, while she lay sleeping on the safe side of me. There were a few things that changed quickly. She learned how to roll over quickly and creep. She fell off the bed twice in her trek towards my husbands alarm clock. Then she started being more restless at night, either waking and nursing constantly or just waking and crying. Needless to say, she took to the crib quickly. No disturbances, no snoring, and quiet. So apart from a few nights where she wakes due to teething or gas, she sleeps in her crib. While my son is snuggled up against me every night.
I'm sure this will change when she is no longer in her crib. But only time will tell that.

Business of Being Born: Down on the Farm

Just watched it with one of my BF's and I have to say, that I LOVED it. Obviously. I want to meet Ina May Gaskin.........so badly. Road Trip tomorrow if it were possible. She has so much love for what she does and such a desire for helping to inform and change how women view pregnancy and birth. She is brilliant.

There was one thing that she said in the movie that just took me totally by surprise and I want to find the actually statistic for it somewhere now and put it here. She claimed that there is no Autism in Amish communities where women give birth in their beds and that there hasn't been a single case of it on The Farm, where she works.
wow.........just wow. That made me stop and think.
Hold on! NONE!? But then that goes to some of the things I posted earlier (much earlier) when I was pregnant about the medications that they give pregnant women in labor. Most of them have no FDA legal dosing, so the Doctors are just winging it and the dose is different per Doctor.
Then there is ultrasounds. It's been proven that when you apply ultrasounds to some cells they enlarge and change.
What are WE doing to our babies in the medical communities??
I just had to write about his quickly. I am exhausted, but fear not there will be more.

The Ammonia Slap

Since it's on my mind right now (because I have my diaper inserts in the washer soaking in hot water as I am writing this), it's going to be my first topic.

I have had a love/hate relationship with my microfiber inserts since day one of using pocket diapers. I loved how absorbent they are, but I hated that they stink easily. And when I say stink I mean 'Ammonia Slap!' stink. I didn't have this problem with my son, but I also used prefolds and gauze flat folds with him. I have been trying desperately to figure out why they stink so bad. I thought it was my washing routine, so I changed that. Nope. Thought maybe it was the detergent I was using, so I now have each CD safe detergent you can buy off of 'Kelly's Closet'. Nope. It has now ended with me having to soak and strip my inserts at almost every single wash.
This is not why I do cloth diapering. I do cloth diapering for the easy factor. The not having to shower, dress, pack up the kids, drive to the store and buy diapers factor. Because really, no one cares that I am outside hanging diapers up to try in my pjs, at two in the afternoon. Especially me.
So this has been the bane of my cloth diapering for the past three months. And mind you, I don't cheat unless I have the rash from heck. My daughter is in cloth even at night.
Then I read something that has brought great, IMMENSE relief to me and answered my question of WHY my inserts stink and slap me in the face when I change a diaper or dump them into my washer.
Microfiber is a polyester fiber. Polyester is made from oil. Microfiber is also man made, it doesn't occur naturally. There is no microfiber tree/plant that people go pick it off of and weave it into something usable.  So basically, by using microfiber, I am expecting something made of oil to absorb a water like fluid. Oil doesn't like water and microfiber doesn't like to let water flow through it. (Very scientific, I know.) So this is the reason my inserts stink! Despite my desperate attempts at washing and rinsing and soaking. PHEW!! I thought I had suddenly developed stupid or something.
So, after the holidays, maybe even before since I really am sick of this. I will be attacking the 5yds of hemp my friend is so kindly going to let me have some of. I'm going to cut it into really long strips that can be folded over themselves for greater absorbency and commence with the washing. Why hemp? Hemp is more absorbent that cotton and I have never ever had an ammonia issue with my hemp inserts. Especially now that they are completely fluffed up. They last up to 6hrs for me, another layer and I foresee awesome night time absorbency and dry mornings in my future.

And I think I'm going to leave this one open with a question. Have you experienced the Ammonia Slap? How did you resolve it?

End of the hiatus...

Or laziness I should say. I had every intention of continuing religiously after I had my daughter. And you see how well that went.
But, I am going to try my hardest from here on to blog, to rant, to vent, and to discuss. Maybe even inform, not sure yet.
Now on to my biggest problem, picking one of the millions of things that has come to mind over the past months and one of the millions of articles, blogs, that I have read to comment on or review in my own way.

Now where to start.............