The potty tantrums

Since my daughter has turned 3, her tantrums have taken on a whole new face. She is now old enough where she wants to exert her own will and make her own choices. This has resulted in tantrums about chocolate milk, tantrums about her brother looking at her, and the potty.

I hate the potty tantrums, with a capital H.

It's something that began very innocently. In an effort to help her become more independent, we taught her to tell us she had to go potty when we were out so as to save her the embarrassment of an accident while at the store. This part of the equation has worked out wonderfully.

Then there is the flip side. She WILL NOT go potty at home unless we grant her permission when she tells us she has to go potty. So when we hear her say "I have to go potty." we have to respond "Okay, go potty." and off she will run. She dumps it, flushes, and washes her hands. Total success. #2's she will call for us to come and clean up. Which that is fine. Don't mind it one bit.

What the problem is, is when we don't hear her or respond in time to her "I have to go potty." cry. Like this morning when I was in the shower. The water is going and the fan is running. Do I hear her outside the bathroom door? No. My oldest announces in his normal voice that she has to go potty. But it is too late. I hear her bedroom door slam and the tantrum has begun. This happens almost daily. It happens when I'm trying to get us out the door for school, to the store, bath time, you name it. The result is a little girl who is ticked off beyond belief because I didn't give her permission to pee, who is now wet, rolling around in a fists of fury tantrum.
This morning was no exception. I was able to sidetrack her with coaxing about seeing her friends, being able to sing songs, have snacks, etc. Gratefully, it wasn't a total wardrobe loss, but it required a change of underpants and stockings. Then the demon reared it's head again while she was going potty and refused to get off of the potty so we could go.

I am so tired of fighting with a half naked mini beast.

Breastfeeding stories

I'm having one of those days where I just feel like I'm under attack about breastfeeding and how I've done it. 

So, I have decided to tell the two very different stories of my two children, when it came to breastfeeding. One is still in the works, but is still very much so valid. 

My Son:  Our bonding relationship in general was off to a rough start due to how his birth was. I didn't get to hold him until he was cleaned up and wrapped like a baby burrito. I remember holding him and staring into his jelly looking eyes (due to the antibiotic eye ointment) and him staring back at me. I failed to nurse him during the crucial time after his birth. Later, the pressure was then on to get him to eat. I had nurse after nurse come in telling me that he had to nurse. I had lactation consultants coming in and fussing with my boobs and my baby. They drizzled formula on me to try and get him to latch on. By the time I left, he was nursing, but he was still sleepy and not really interested. 

At home, it took almost a week before my milk came it. The sweet sound of my baby gulping filled my ears. Then the misery started. He had a tucked in chin, making him resemble a baby bird, but also making it difficult for him to nurse. I suffered from cracked nipples that took weeks to heal. My left one is scarred from how badly it was cracked. With cracked nipples I suffered plugged ducts that turned into mastitis, leaving me useless and in bed with my baby shaking with cold chills. I struggled through nights of screaming as my son had emptied me and cried with hunger. I gave in a few times, giving him a bottle with the formula that 'magically' appeared at my doorstep. This would fill him up and he would sleep, then I would sleep. 

Pumping so the I could go back to work was challenging. I had a manual pump and I do not recommend them. I could barely get any out and we had to supplement with formula while I was at work. He took the breastflow bottle with his milk warm. It never seemed to bother him that it wasn't me. 

At 6 months, my son decided he didn't want bottles of any kind anymore. He ate only baby food and woke up when I got home from work. I would take him to bed with me and he nursed while I slept. 

He continued to nurse until he was 2. I nursed him through teething and a double ear infection that Christmas and then he never showed interest in it or asked for it again after. 

My Daughter: With my daughters birth, I was able to nurse her immediately after she was born. She suckled, not really interested in it for anything else but comfort. All she wanted to do was nurse. Her rooting reflex was beyond strong, with her going after anything that smelled like me or milk.  She has continued so far, making her demands quiet clear by head diving for it when I hold her. 

I am also working again, but this time with a dual electric pump. She doesn't like her milk warm and she doesn't like the breastflow bottle. It's almost as though she is saying "I know it's not mommy, don't even try to trick me." She hasn't ever been supplemented with formula and it hasn't 'magically' appeared at my doorstep. Coupons have, but not actual product. 

I am hoping that we will be able to continue as long as with my son. So far it is the lifesaver of teething.